Cool Pictures

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I found these pictures on a cool website called Criggo

The Super Bowl pick

This is what the whole season has come down to. The Super Bowl. The last game of the year, the last chance to bet on football for 8 months (if you bet on the Pro Bowl, you need help).

There are only 2 options when it comes to betting on the Super Bowl:
#1 Go Big. If you are down money on the year, go double or nothing. Or even more. Worst case scenario, it is a 50/50 chance. Make the biggest bet of the year in the biggest game of the year. With a huge bet, this could be the most memorable Super Bowl ever.

#2 Take it easy. Honestly, who the hell knows what's going to happen? Most likely, you'll be at a party watching the game with a ton of people who know nothing about football. There will be SO much going on during the game, you won't want to have to focus on the spread. Just make a small moneyline bet and enjoy the party.

I must admit, I've picked the Super Bowl wrong about 13 of the past 15 years. I truly defy statistics. But I have good news, I KNOW who is going to cover. I mean I really honestly KNOW that Pittsburgh is going to cover. They HAVE to.

The Cardinals are not on a hot streak. The Cardinals are on a lucky streak, and the extra week between games is not going to be good for them. Sure Kurt Warner has God on his side, but so what. The entire city of Pittsburgh is straight from Hell. Surely, the dark prince will be doing everything in his power to help the Steelers win.

I feel bad that I can't quite put into words what the Steelers are going to do to the Cardinals. Seven points will be nothing. I hope Simmons picks the Steelers, because he will be able to make a much better case for them than I will. Just know that I have a strong gut feeling about the Steelers. I'm definitely in the "Go Big" camp.

100% Nonpartisan Political Post

President George W. H. Obama


A really cool picture of Obama's inauguration.

Anybody see Dwight Howard in that picture?

Funny Stuff

Guide to Super Bowl Proposition Bets

I love proposition bets. Maybe its because during the regular season I bet on 10 games a week, so I want to make a lot of bets during the Super Bowl. Maybe its because I suck at picking them, and I enjoy losing money. Either way, there are hundreds of proposition bets, so I’ve picked out a couple that I will be betting on. My advice is keep it low. I bet 5 bucks on each of these.

Cardinals 1st half points +17.5 vs Steelers full game points
I don’t see the Steelers scoring a ton of points, so I think this is a solid bet. Will I be brave enough to pick the Cards to cover the final score?? Find out Tuesday(ish)

LeBron James made 3s pick em vs Kurt Warner TD passes
LeBron is averaging 1.3 threes a game. Warner is averaging 2 TD’s a game. Hmm. I think LeBron gets 2 threes, Warner might match him, but I don’t see him throwing 3 touchdown’s against Pittsburgh. Take LeBron and a push is the worst case scenario.

Rasheed Wallace points and rebounds -2.5 vs Cardinals first downs
Rasheed is averaging 19.5. Cardinals had 15 vs Atlanta, 16 vs Carolina, and 21 vs Philly. I’m thinking Pittsburgh’s D is going to keep this number relatively low.

Steelers/Cardinals 2nd qtr points -1.5 vs Magic made 3pt FGs
The Magic broke the record for 3’s in a game last week, but they are only averaging 10 threes a game. The 2nd quarter is favorite for highest scoring quarter. Root for FG as the teams go into halftime.

Super Bowl MVP: Ben Roethlisberger +175
If you think the Steelers are going to win, I say this is a much better bet than Steelers -250 on the money line.

Steelers score 1st and win the game - Even money
Another bet that makes the Steelers moneyline look like a sucker bet.

Player's jersey # to score first: Under 38.5:
Just to remind you, Willie Parker is #39, Santonio Holmes is #10, Larry Fitzgerald is #11, Troy Polamalu is #43.

No Safety -1300
No OT -1100
The game will not be decided by exactly 3 points -600
Total number of players with a pass attempt over 2.5 +160
Somebody will try to do something tricky, right? The Cardinals had that throw back play against Philadelphia, and Anquan Boldin played quarterback in college.

Ben Roethlisberger passing yards -35.5 vs Pennsylvania College Points
I saw this bet on sportsbook.com, and I was so shocked I had to call them and get clarification. I found out that it is Penn State’s total points (against Michigan State) vs Roetlisberger. Ummm, this is the biggest no brainer I have EVER seen. Ever.
Penn State’s high score on the year is 89 points. Roethlisberger has gone under 125 yards 4 times. Roethlisberger’s over under for the Super Bowl is 230.5
*Update* As I was typing this I talked myself into making another bet on this one, and sportsbook had removed the bet. I’m guessing my $50 bet really moved the line.

The coin toss! Heads or Tails? The odds are only -101, so it’s better than red/black roulette.
Jeff Reed says “tails never fails.”

Feel free to leave your favorite proposition bet in the comments.

John Calipari thinks something is wrong with Tyreke Evans

University of Memphis basketball Coach, John Calipari, is a little upset with freshman guard, Tyreke Evans.



Unrelated, here is a breakdown of Super Bowl Proposition Bets

Embarrassing Moment from Miss America

I watched the Miss America pageant last night and saw this:


If you didn't see why it was funny, check out the arm pits:


I guess I'm a bad person, but I found it pretty funny that Miss Kentucky was talking about her most embarrisng pageant monent, while she was standing there with huge pit stains.

And because I feel bad about posting this, here is a better picture of Miss Kentucky:

Nothing to be embarrassed of there!

I guess today is a pretty good day to weigh in with a couple political thoughts.

I really wish John McCain would have won…….8 years ago. I really bought into that straight talk express. Even back then he was an older guy with a lot of political experience, but Washington hadn't really seemed to get to him. He thought he would be able to cut through the politics, not play the dumb games, and be able to win. If he would have won 8 years ago, I think he would have been an excellent president. But he didn't win. And, he didn't win mainly because of dirty politics, and I think that changed him. He thought voters would support him taking actual stances on issues, that voters would understand that he was not a regular politician, that he wouldn't play stupid political games. Well, the voters are idiots, and they elected George W. Bush.

8 years later McCain ran for the highest office again, but he wasn't the same guy. He turned into somebody that would say and do anything for votes. Hillary Clinton was the same way. The main thing that jumps to my mind was that stupid gas tax holiday. Both of them supported it, while Obama laughed at them. Throughout the whole campaign, Clinton and McCain both acted like they had already earned the presidency. Almost like it was their right and they were indignant that somebody else had the gall to challenge them.

"Fortunately",* Obama decided to run for president. His campaign consisted mostly of him looking handsome, acting cool, speaking extraordinarily eloquently, and making broad promises of hope and change. The perfect campaign.

So how will Obama do as president? I have no idea. I predict football games (poorly) not politics. However, there is one thing I'm confident Obama will do, that I haven't really heard mentioned anywhere. I really think that Obama will restore support in the United States of people from foreign countries. Or at least no longer make us a laughing stock.

My wife and I have traveled overseas twice in the last 3 years. Both times she tried to convince me that we should wear Canadian flag pins on our backpacks so that people wouldn't be mean to us because we were Americans. I talked her out of it both times and we were never treated poorly, but just having the conversation about it sucked. The majority of the world does not like the United States, and I think it is primarily because of George W Bush.

But now. Now we have a black guy named Barack Hussein Obama as our president. That's nuts. Ask the average American his opinion on India and thier Prime Minister Manmohan Singh. Then ask the average American his opinion on India and tell him India's Prime Minister is a white guy named Fred Johnson. I think they will have a slightly higher regard in the second scenario.

What I'm basically trying to say is, remember the guy that threw his shoe at Bush?



I don't think anyone is going to throw a shoe at Obama. Mr. President, feel free to use that quote in any future campaigns.

*I say "fortunately" because I didn't support Obama. I do think he will be better than McCain, and MUCH better than Clinton. I was one of those crazy people that supported Ron Paul.

NFL Conference Championship Picks

There are only 3 games left, crack open your wallets, and get ready to make some money. I’m 5-3 in the playoffs (and technically, I bet on Baltimore both weeks even though I picked against them. That’s 7-1!!!).

I am 100% positive about my two picks this week, get ready to win a lot of money this week. To get my picks all you have to do is call 1-900-EASY MONEY. It’s only $49.99 a minute, and I stutter really bad so be prepared for a pretty large bill. Or you can just keep reading. Your choice.

EAGLES -4 @ Cardinals
I don’t know anybody that picked the Cardinals last week. Oh shit, I forgot, I picked them. This week HA! They don’t have a chance. They have been insanely lucky, and there luck ends Sunday.
Also, think about who they beat, the Falcons and the Panthers. Two almost identical teams – 1 shakey QB, 1 really good WR, 2 really good RBs, solid defense, and strong run game. Now think about Philly – they are almost the exact opposite. 1 great QB, 0 good WRs, 1 great RB, a great defense, and almost no run game. This is too easy.

Steelers -6 vs. Ravens
The defenses are a push, the Steelers have the better quarterback. I’ll take Willie Parker over all the Ravens RB. Plus, the Steelers have better WRs. The Ravens are much more stylish dressers, and they talk trash better, but the Steelers are at home. Pittsburgh should cover the six points.

*Bet of the week: Eagles/Steelers money line parlay. $10 to win $11.
The BuggyBowl is on.

Roger Goodell speaks to a (gulp) blog

The Big Lead got a chance to interview the NFL Commissioner. Check it out here. It left me pretty I was pretty disappointed. Not in TBL, but in Goodell. At first I thought it was pretty cool that he spoke to a blog, but after thinking about it, I was pissed off it took him so long. The other thing that I didn’t like were his answers. They sucked. He sounded exactly like a politician, and I absolutely hate politician.

Here are two excerpts:
Q: Each morning, we’ll usually check out Youtube to look for exciting dunks or game-winning homers. I’d like to do that for the NFL, but the league is sure to keep all video highlights off YouTube. Do you feel like it is a disservice to fans?
I don’t think there’s a better time to be an NFL fan. When I was a child, I had to wait until halftime of Monday Night Football to watch the highlights from the Sunday games. Now, there’s more content than ever out there, and fans can get those highlights through many devices.
[This answer is so much bullshit it pisses me off. “When I was a kid, I had to walk 10 miles in the snow to get to a newspaper…blah,blah,blah. I thought Goodell was young enough to get the internet, but obviously he isn’t.]

Q: Changes have been made in the league to enhance offense – kickoffs, pass interference – and kickers have improved their accuracy over the last 30 years. We heard a stat that claimed in the last five years, 62 % of the teams that win the coin toss in overtime win the game. Do you feel the overtime format should be changed? And do you like the college overtime format?
We’ve looked at this repeatedly over the last 50 years. We believe that the integrity of the game should stay the same in regular and post season, but on the other hand, we have to determine a victor in the postseason. The reason I think there’s merit to what we have is that the object is to win the game in regulation. The fact that it is sudden death in postseason, and that a coin toss starts overtime, puts every incentive on teams to win the game in regulation. And I prefer our format to the college format.
[This sounds straight out of a George Orwell novel. Absolutely NO football fan prefers the NFL overtime format. Not one. The commissioner is just spouting off bullshit. He could have at least admitted the system is flawed, but instead he just switches between “we” and “I” while obnoxiously defending an indefensible position.]

The whole interview reads like a Senate judicial conformation hearing, where Goodell is trying to talk without saying or admitting anything.

Biggest. Upset. Ever.

Arizona Cardinals are going to host the NFC Conference Championship game!
WOW!
Eagles Fans rejoice the game isn’t at home, Will Leitch’s head explodes, my bookie gets real nervous, and Larry Fitzgerald mushroom stamps the entire Carolina Panthers organization.

NFL Round 2 Playoff Picks Take 2

The girls from fuel.tv love my picks.
Eagles +4@ Giants
I'm pretty nervous about this pick. For one thing, the Eagles have Andy Reid as their coach. Even though, I don't think Tom Coughlin is that much better, its still disconcerting to look at the team you bet on and see a fat tub of lard is coaching. The Eagles won in New York just a couple weeks ago, but the situation is a lot different. The Giants have to be used to not having Plaxico, and they have a lot more to play for. So, why am I going with Philly? I guess I'm on board with Donovan McNabb. This could be his last year in Philadelphia, he seems to be running the ball more, and I think things are just going to click for this team today. We'll see.

Steelers -6 vs. Chargers *Lock of the week*
Make no mistake about it, the Chargers were not lucky last week. They played really well, and they deserved to beat the Colts. Sproles was a total badass, and he is going to be getting the bulk of the touches today. It won't matter. Sproles is VERY overrated. He has had some good games and some very good plays, but he hasn't played Pittsburgh. Everyone has been saying the field is going to slow down Pittsburgh's defense. Well, probably, but they will be used to it. Sproles will not. His number one weapon is quickness, and he will be without that today.
Do you remember that punt from last year?


Yeah, Sproles is going crazy on that field... Steelers win by more than a touchdown, and I think we just might have an "Amish Buggy" Super Bowl!

NFL Playoff Picks Round 2

Does anyone have any idea what is going to happen this weekend? I sure as hell don’t. The more thought I put into these games the less confident I get. I’ve changed my mind twenty times, but this is what I settled on. I made a bet on each game, but the odds makers aren’t exactly moving the line after my bet.

Titans -3 vs Ravens
I’ll have a post on my thoughts on Bill Simmons later, for now I will just say he is a very convincing writer and I have to make my picks before I read his column because I’m afraid he will talk me into his picks. This week he helped break it down so simply that I had to go with him – Rookie QB. On the road. Against a great defense.

Cardinals +10 @ Panthers
The Cardinals are very overrated, and the worst part is that they aren’t rated very high to begin with. The Panthers have a solid defense, a great running game, and Steve Smith. The Cardinals can’t run the ball, have a geriatric QB, a rape victim for a defensive tackle, and they give up the 5th most points in the NFL. And then, there is that whole 0-5 on the East coast. Yikes! So, why the hell would I pick them? Ummmm, I don’t really know. 10 points is a lot, especially for a playoff game.

But I think it was an interview of Bertran Berry on PTI. They asked him about being 0-5 on the East coast. His smile faded, and he shook his head as he looked down. He said they had been hearing that nonstop, and he didn’t know why they couldn’t win on the road. I have two theories. #1 the suck and they are going to get blown out tonight. #2 it was a lack of focus, I’m siding with #2. I think this team will have been super focused this week. They are going to come out very prepared, and they are going to challenge Carolina.

Picture is Joanna Krupa from The Last Braincell

1 Month Anniversary

Marilyn Monroe celebrates NASB’s 1 month anniversary with a glass of Dom.
Wow. I made it a month. Honestly, I really wasn’t sure I would. Luckily people enjoyed my posts on Hannah Storm, my Wikipedia Word was surprisingly well received, and then that whole end zone celebration orgy thing happened. I 'm hoping my Tim Cowlishaw post will catch on, because I think it's a pretty funny story.

I couldn't have made it a month by myself so a huge thank you to:
Everyone who visited the site.
Everyone that linked to my site, specifically:
http://www.deadspin.com/
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/extramustard/
http://freakonomics.blogs.nytimes.com/
http://www.thebiglead.com/
http://www.oliverwillis.com/
http://www.bustedcoverage.com/
http://www.ballhype.com/
Everyone that clicked on one of those google ads.
The 17 blessed souls that subscribe to the feed.

I really hope I was able to post something that somebody enjoyed, and I hope I can continue to do that.

I didn't get my google adsense account set up until December 16th, so the data is incomplete. That being said, I had 24,501 page views, and 23 clicks resulting in ……..$7.93!!! If a couple hundred more people clicked on adds I could quit my day job and work on this blog full time. As soon as I earn $100.00 Google will send me a check! I’m thinking I'll be going out for sushi around September 09.

Again, thanks for stopping by. I hope you are at least a little entertained, if so, click one of those google ads, and I’ll get to try and get fired George Costanza style.

Thanks.

Tim Cowlishaw got Hammered

I hinted at this in my early picks post, and before I reveal the story, just a few caveats. I have absolutely nothing against Cowlishaw. I have not read a single one of his columns, but I do think he is one of the few tolerable people on the terrible show, Around the Horn. A friend of mine told me about this on New Years Eve, but I waited for all the details before I posted it.

The facts: on December 26th Tim Cowlishaw was admitted to a Dallas emergency room with a head wound.

The story: The day after Christmas, Tim Cowlishaw got out of his mind drunk, partied way too hard, fell down, and busted his head open.

The funny part: He passed out in the hospital that night due to being completely wasted, head busted, and pain medicated. He woke up the next day, December 27th, and started freaking out and screaming, “I have to get to Philadelphia, I have to get to Philadelphia!!!” (The Cowboys were playing the Eagles with the playoffs on the line). He tried to leave the hospital but the doctors wouldn’t let him.

The things I found hardest to believe about the story: Cowlishaw is 53. I figured he was 45 at the oldest. I’m not good at judging age, but Cowlishaw looks pretty good for 53. Then again, the only time I see him he is next to Woody Paige, Bob Ryan, and Bill Plaschke, so I guess it is easy to look young.

Also, Cowlishaw was with an absolutely smoking hot chick. I figured he was famous around Dallas, but I was a little shocked to find out how hot this chick was. I was told he has absolutely no problem getting seriously hot tail in Dallas. Sort of amazing.

The Proof: Unfortunately, other than my track record of being a completely honest and stand up guy, I don’t have much proof. It was one of my really good friends that was the eye witness, not me.

I did try to find some proof though. I couldn’t find anything related to this particular night, but there is a documented history of Tim Cowlishaw getting drunk in the presence of hot young ladies:
Busted Coverage 1
Busted Coverage 2

Also:
There was nothing posted on Cowlishaw’s Blog between Dec 22 and Jan 1
Tim Cowlishaw Blog
And, Cowlishaw had no columns between Dec 24 and Jan 4:
Tim Cowlishaw Dallas News

Of course it was the holiday season, so its easy to understand why he didn’t write anything. But then again, you think he would have written something for the Dallas/Philly game, right?

One more thing. Wikipedia says he graduated high school in 1973. That puts him right at 53, which is how old my friend said he was.

My friend is a really funny guy, so I know he told the story much better than I was able to write it, but hopefully I was able to express the humor.

I'm not out to trash Cowlishaw. I don't think it is that big of a deal (DUI is about 1000 times worse), everyone has embarrassing drunk stories, and this one was too funny not to share.

NFL PLayoffs Round 2 Early Picks

Ravens +3 @ Titans

The Titans are good, but I'm going with the "they peaked too early" theory. Plus Ed Reed is a BMF.

Cards +10 @ Panthers

This line just seemed too high, and the Cardinals already played at Carolina early this year and only lost by 4. I think Fitzgerald and Boldin are good enough to keep the Cardinals in the game. However, if Darnell Docket's ass rape injury keeps him out of this game, I might change my mind.

Eagles +4 @ Giants

I believe in the Eagles. The Giants are a little banged up, this will be a game where they really miss Plaxico. And, I still don't trust Eli Manning. I know he won a Super Bowl, but I just can't trust him, he's too damn goofy looking. Sorry.

Steelers -6 vs. Chargers

I still hate LT and Rivers. Really hate. Epically hate. Unconditionally, unexplainable, unnaturally hate both of them. The Steelers defense is going to be like an adult going to Chuck E. Chesee to play the Whack-a-Mole arcade game, and the mole is Darrin Sproles. Whack-a-Sproles. This is my early lock of the week.

More on these games later in the week. Plus some pretty big inside (embarrassing/hilarious) information on a Sportswriter/ESPN talking head. Any guesses on who (its not Mariotti)?

Wade Phillips

Note: I meant to post this last Monday, but since I already wrote it, I figured I'd go ahead and post it now.

I turned on the Cowboys game during halftime to discover that I was missing an awesomely historic assbeating. As I enjoyed the second half I noticed a truly great play.

Early in the 3^rd quarter the Cowboys, trailing 27-3, were driving around their own 40 yard line when Romo threw incomplete on 3^rd and 1. The announcers are saying that the Cowboys should probably go for it on 4th down. The camera shows Wade Phillips saying "Punt," then it shows Romo, and he waves the punt team off the field. It cuts back to Phillips, and he again says to punt and tells the punt team to get on the field. Then it shows Romo loudly waiving the punt team off the field with both hands and probably a couple "f bombs."

The punt team slinks back to the sideline, and as the Cowboys get ready to go for it, the camera shows Phillips again. He is looking like his normal dumpy, dejected, slightly bewildered self, and he pouts softly to an assistant coach "He can't do that."

This absolutely cracked me up, and it perfectly epitomized Wade Phillips as a coach too. His players like him but have no fear or respect for him. They don't trust his decision making, and they have zero faith in his competency.

It is fair to say that I saw a similar thing happen with Tony Dungy and Peyton Manning a couple years ago. However, that time it seamed like Manning was saying, "trust me, coach, we can get the first down". Romo was saying, "Wade, what the hell are you doing? Are you stupid? We HAVE to go for it, you stupid son of a bitch."

Fearless prediction: "The Dallas Cowboys will never win a playoff game with Wade Phillips as their head coach."

Wild Card Weekend 2.0

I would like to amend a statement from yesterday’s post. I wrote “I hate Peyton Manning, but I REALLY, REALLY hate LaDanian Tomlinson and Phillip Rivers. So I hope they both get gorilla masked.” The part about LT and Marmalard getting gorilla masked, I stand by. The part about me having only “hate” for Peyton Manning, I take back. That does not properly convey the intense desire I have to see him get ran over by a midget driving a high speed steam roller. How the fuck did that schmuck win the MVP? I guess it was “nobody was really that great this year so lets give it to the guy who is in all those commercials.”

Except, plenty of people were great. If you vote for stats, Drew Brees was 16 yards short of breaking the record for most passing yards in a season. If you vote for most valuable to their team, Matt Ryan and Chad Pennington turned laughing stocks into playoff teams. If you vote for general awesomeness, Marshawn Lynch was solid, and we all know it don’t get no better than solid. Defense? DeMarcus Ware had 20 sacks, 84 tackles, and forced 6 fumbles. Ed Reed had led the league with 9 interceptions and 3 defensive touchdowns. Patrick Willis had 109 tackles by his damn self, plus he ran a pick back 86 damn yards.

Instead the award goes to Peyton Manning, and I die a little inside. I’ve always thought it was BS he got the award, but I only chose to write about it after the Colts fucked me over last night. I risked significant amounts of money on them to win the game (upwards of $25), and they promptly shit the bed. Now I’m left rooting for a plane crash.

Ravens -3.5 @ Dolphins
That damn half a point. It could be humongous in this game. The Dolphins are built around ball security, and the Ravens don’t exactly have an explosive offense, which means that this game should be pretty close. Holy shit. I just talked myself into the Dolphins as I was typing this.
*New Pick* DOLPHINS +3.5 vs. Ravens
I don’t think the wildcat will work too well against the Ravens, and I think the Ravens defense is good enough to get a couple turnovers and maybe a big special teams play. Plus, Baltimore won by 14 in Miami earlier this year, but last year Miami beat Baltimore to avoid going winless. (Oh yeah, Miami almost went winless last year) Now I want to switch back. Ugh. I’ll stick with Dolphins, but I’m staying away from this game gambling-wise.

Eagles -3 @ Vikings
Andy Reid sends Donovan McNabb to the bench one time and all the sudden he stops sucking? That’s great coaching. Or a coincidence. (side note: McNabb’s pathetic performance against the Redskins cost me a fantasy football championship, so I would have no problem with McNabb’s being given a pigskin suppository.) Big Daddy Drew lays out a pretty nice case for the Eagles in his Jamboroo

So go with his sage advice. Although he could just be trying to convince himself the Vikings are going to lose so that when they do lose, he doesn’t kill himself.

The main reason I’m going against the Vikings is because of Tarvaris Jackson. This is a guy that couldn’t beat out Matt Jones for the starting quarterback position at the University of Arkansas. Seriously. Jackson couldn’t get any playing time, so he transferred to Alabama State. And what is Matt Jones doing these days? Playing wide receiver, snorting cocaine, and calling Joey Porter gay.

Darnell Dockett got Raped

Yes, Chris Collinsworth, I think maybe that was too much.

This was right after Matty Ice was sacked for a safety and the Cardinals got an excessive celebration penalty. All Darnell Dockett wanted to do was have a few bucking bronco rides, and the referee has to comes in and stick his hand in his taint. Unfortunate.

WILDCARD, Bitches!!!!!!!

WILDCARD, Bitches!!!!!!!

If you have not seen the tv show, Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia, do the world a favor and watch it. It is hilarious. Somebody described it as Seinfeld + Crack, and I think that is pretty accurate. This is probably my favorite episode from the most recent season: The Gang Solves The Gas Crisis watch it now, thank me later.

In my crew I was unanimously voted the wildcard, while the other schmucks fought over who got to be the looks and who wasn’t the muscle.

Why did I bring this up? Oh yeah, wildcard weekend in the NFL. Earlier this week all four home teams were underdogs. That is not a typo. All four wildcard teams were favored on the road. The lines have moved slightly, and we now have 2 pick em’s and 2 home dogs. This is weird.

Picking Texas Tech was a debacle, and my confidence is shaken pretty bad, but I have to keep going, so here are my picks.

Cardinals pick em vs Falcons
There are a lot of different stats to look at for this game. Cardinals 6-2 at home, Falcons 4-4 on the road. Cardinals outscored their opponents by a combined 1 point, Falcons by 66. Or the fact that the Cardinals bead exactly 1 playoff team this year. All interesting, all irrelevant. I don’t know what is going to happen in this game, and neither does anybody else. All I know is I’m taking the home team, and I don’t have to give any points. Plus, the Cardinals have a former MVP and Super Bowl champ at QB and the Falcons have a rookie. And, one home team HAS to win this weekend.

Colts pick em @ San Diego
Luckily, I DO know what is going to happen in this game. The Colts are going to wreck shop. I’ve heard a lot of talk about how San Diego has won 4 games in a row and how they are peaking at the right time. Umm…*Cough-bullshit*….*Cough-bullshit*…The Colts have won NINE games in a row (one of those wins was in San Diego) and are looking really good. Plus San Diego's four wins were against Oakland, Kansas City (miracle win), Tampa Bay, and Denver. Not impressive.
Also, I hate Peyton Manning, but I REALLY, REALLY hate LaDanian Tomlinson and Phillip Rivers. So I hope they both get gorilla masked.

Picking the Cotton Bowl

I meant to post this a little sooner than an hour before kick off, but better late than never. I have the absolute lock of the bowl season. Texas Tech -6 vs Ole Miss.

I think line actually might only be -4, but I'm saying -6 just to be safe. Texas Tech might win this game by 75 points. Seriously. Both Mike Leach and Houston Nutt are both crazy, but I think Leach's craziness is more productive. Ole Miss has overachieved all season, but they won't be able to beat Texas Tech. The Tech offense is just too good, and there is no way that Ole Miss will be able keep up with them.

This is a break the bank game. My 5 million star, can't lose pick of the millennium. When you place you bet, talk shit to your bookie. This one is money in the bank. Make the biggest bet of your life, it's infinitely safer than the stock market.

Me? I'm betting $55.

Picture from Every Day Should Be Saturday.

UPDATE (Jan 3 1:47 AM): Wow! I feel like a freaking moron. I'm just glad nobody is reading this because I would feel like a dumbass.