Week 15 NFL

NFL football picks is one of the main reasons I started this blog. Hopefully, you followed my advice for last nights game and took the Bears -3. Congratulations on that push. You get all the thrill of gambling, without the winning or losing. If you were in Vegas, you got to drink for free and enjoy yourself for a solid 3 hours. Plus, you ALMOST won, damn it.

Packers -1.5 at JAGS
The Fred Taylor quote killed any chances I had of picking the JAGS to cover again. He said this is the worst team he has ever played on. Yikes. Plus I think Aaron Rogers still has a lot to play for even if the Packers don't.

Lions +17.5 at COLTS
DAMN that's a lot of points. If the Colts win by 2 touchdowns AND a field goal, they still don't cover! Vegas just barely made the big enough, so I'm changing my mind on this one and taking the points.

Skins -7 at BENGALS
This line moved a little, but not enough. The Skins lost a couple offensive linemen, but the Bengals have lost their soul. They have been outscored 69-6 in the last 2 weeks. Clinton Portis seems pretty fired up for this game, he might score 3 touchdowns and then donkey punch Jim Zorn.

FALCONS -2.5 vs Bucs
The Bucs gave up 950 rushing yards and rushing 12 touchdowns last Monday. The Falcons have two really good running backs, and they are at home. Less than a field goal is a gift.

DOLPHINS -6.5 vs 49ers
I am HUGE 49ers fan. I don't believe they are that good. I've seen Shaun Hill play in person, and he was truly, remarkably terrible. There is no way they cover 3 straight against the AFC East. A related note. I absolutely hate it when people don't pronounce the "H" at the beginning of words. the 'H' should sound like Hugh (like in Hefner) not Ewww (like somebody just shit their pants.) One of the many reasons I want to kill Tony Kornheiser every Monday night.

Seahawks -2.5 RAMS
Apparently the Seahawks don't suck. The Steven Jackson situation closely resembles the Clinton Portis situation, only I think Portis' is constructive and Jackson's is destructive. Just a hunch. I will not be gambling on this game, because I would feel like I had to watch it, and that would be miserable.

Bills +8.5 at JETS
One of my main gambling rules is: Always take Trent Edwards on the road against Brett Favre. Wait, what? This was another game where I changed my mind. 8.5 is just too many points. Plus I enjoy screaming "BEAST MODE" every time Marshawn Lynch touches the ball. He is stupid fast.

Titans -3 at TEXANS
The Texans are on a roll. They beat the Browns, the Jags, and the Packers!!! Which is awesome, except all those teams kind of suck. That being said, I think the Texans year could have been a lot different if it wasn't for that fuckin hurricane. That was this year right? Why is no one talking about this? I think it screwed their team pretty bad. Also, the Titans are REALLY good. They are still undefeated right? That whole thing with the Jets didn't really count did it?

RAVENS -2.5 vs Steelers
The Steelers have played (and won) two big games in a row. I think it catches up with them here and they lose this one. It will probably be close, but a field covers, so i'll take *gulp* Joe Flacco against the Steelers defense. That doesn't sound very good. I'll take the Ravens defense against Ben Roethlisberger. Much better.

PANTHERS -7.5 vs Broncos
http://sports.yahoo.com/nfl/teams/den/injuries
http://sports.yahoo.com/nfl/teams/car/injuries
One list is a lot longer than the other. And they are at home.

Chargers -5.5 at CHIEFS
I can not bring myself to bet on Tyler Thigpen. I just can't do it. I know the Chiefs have been putting up big numbers, but Thigpen has only won 1 game. And it was against the Chiefs. Plus, the Chargers are not out of the playoffs yet. If they win their next two AND Denver loses their next two, they play each other for the AFC West title. Also, this is the fantasy football playoffs, and LDT hasn't had a big game in a while. I think LDT is going to make up for his less than steller performance and he will explode these next two weeks and earn championships for a lot of grumpy owners.

CARDINALS -3 vs Vikings
I switched my pick on this game. Arizona has been pretty good against the run, and Vikings haven't been too good against the pass. Also, I trust Kurt Warner a whole hell of a lot more than I trust Tarvaris Jackson. In related news, I agree with Will Leitch when he says the Cards have their division clinched, they aren't getting a bye, so sit Warner and let Leinart get some practice/take some beatings. http://deadspin.com/5104672/the-playoff-buzzsaw-that-is-the-arizona-cardinals

Patriots -7 at RAIDERS
Lock of the week. The Raiders took four straight days off after they got Gorrila Masked by San Diego last Thursday. I don't get it. They got beat 34-7 in prime time on semi-National television. That tells me they need more practice, not less. I could understand taking it easy for a couple days. But no lifting, no stretching, no conditioning, no video. Nothing. For 4 days. Randy Moss feels disrespected.

Giants +2..5 at COWBOYS
The second to last game at Texas stadium might be remembered as the game when TO choked Jason Witten to death on the sideline and had to be taken away in hadcuffs. Owens being jealous of their relationship is just weird. This whole thing has a 'fatal attraction' kind of feel to it. And after hearing some of the quotes from anonymous Cowboy's player I wouldn't be surprised if Owens shows up with a black eye on Sunday. Probably not as distracting as the Plaxico Burress shooting last week, but at least the Giants haven't been all over Sportscenter for their off the field stuff this week. Take the money line.

EAGLES -14 vs Browns
ESPN has to be kicking themselves for this game. A 14 point favorite. Two historically dumb coaches. One who weighs 400 pounds and who I'm quite sure stuffs cheesesteaks into his pockets. The other who has fans performing animal sacrifices to get him fired and to have Bill Cower save their franchise. And KEN DORSEY!!!!!!! (22-46, 150 yards, 0 TD's, 2 picks) The Eagles might not cover, but there is no way in hell I would bet on the Browns.